The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed. ~Charles Schulz
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby